i like this website, it's like seeing a snippet of someone elses mind. probably gonna make something like this one day. to return the favor, i'm giving my most recent entry in my diary, for you to get a snippet of my mind. if you find it interesting, here's my discord: tridzfr. i like meeting new people so don't be shy!

man i love the universe so much
.
i’m not even joking.
sometimes i just sit here overwhelmed by the fact that i get to exist at all.
the observable universe contains something like 10^80 particles,
and for a brief moment in cosmic history,
some of them became me.
.
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today is my birthday,
and somehow instead of feeling older, i just feel grateful.
grateful that i got another year to see the sky, play games, talk to people, laugh at stupid things, feel warmth, feel music, feel alive.
.
i feel so absurdly privileged to be alive.
like my entire body is overflowing with gratitude and joy and love for everything around me.
.
for everyone.
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i can suddenly see how small my problems are compared to the sheer miracle of being here at all.
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and somehow that realization doesn’t make life feel meaningless.
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it makes it feel gentle.
.
haha.
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i love you.
i love this world.
there is so much beauty in it.
.
and maybe i’ve spent a lot of my life hiding things behind my irony or humor.
but right now i just want to say things sincerely.
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life feels so gentle to me right now.
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i feel joy.
.
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i’m such a simpleton.
if people could feel what i’m feeling right now they’d probably envy how happy i am.
.
i wish i could take this hope burning in my chest and divide it equally among everyone alive.
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i genuinely wish happiness for everyone.
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DUDE i cannot stop talking about how much love i’m feeling right now.
i feel like i’m dissolving into it.
like i’m going to melt into a puddle of pure love and stop being a person entirely and just become the concept itself
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i love you all so much.
thank you.
seriously. thank you.
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maybe it’s the alcohol talking
but the weird thing is i still feel logical. i still feel like myself.
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the only difference is that every part of me is flooded with love for the universe and everything in it.
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maybe the alcohol just lowered whatever barrier normally keeps me from saying these things out loud.
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because if it were socially acceptable, i think i would tell every single person i know that i love them right now.
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aaaaaaaa
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i just can’t stop.
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love love love love love
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iloveyouiloveyouiloveyou
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forever. infinitely.
in every infinitesimal fragment of time and space, my love exists there too.
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there aren’t enough words in any language for what i’m trying to say.
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please don’t give up, whoever you may be
from the bottom of my heart, thank you - no matter how briefly our lives touched - for treating me with kindness.
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i love you all.
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sometimes i feel like the universe has been far too gentle to someone as ignorant and flawed as me.
why do i get to experience this warmth while so many better people suffer without it?
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i am deeply grateful.
but more than anything, i wish i could share this happiness with the people who cannot afford to feel it.