Marie and her Von Heisen Cocoa

 

Scene 1

 

Dawn. Two cockroach brothers sit in the corner of a dusty kitchen. Lying on the floor area are a crumbled piece of paper, a soda can, and an assortment of crumbs. HORIMER, the elder of the two, is trancedly brooding while the young BENIZAL rubs his feelers together with apprehensive anticipation.

 

A cookie jar lies in the far corner of the kitchen, sitting atop a shelf suspended six feet above the ground.

 

BENIZAL

I think it is going to be the usual for me, brother.

Iíll take a nibble out of that cookie for our dear mother.

 

HORIMER (with a jolt)

A sacrifice that removes the thrill!

Iím beginning to wonder if you even have the skill.

 

BENIZAL

Brother Horimer, please refrain if you will.

What thrill could you possess when theyíve the intent to kill?

 

HORIMER

Remember, young Benizal, that rattling of the bones?

A chill of excitement hiding under the ice cream cones?

 

BENIZAL

Oh, I do hope with this plan youíve conceived

I wonít find myself tomorrow hopelessly bereaved!

 

HORIMER

Nonsense, brother! You have nothing to worry about!

Worse comes to worst, Iíll hide away in the grout!

 

BENIZAL

Remember, dear brother, what happened to poor Ciosig?

Her conscience was swept like a two-tailed pig!

 

HORIMER

That wench reeked of a stench so strong

We all knew deep inside that she didnít have long!

 

BENIZAL

You donít understand, Horimer, the power of those creatures

Stalking the days like giants, with the most devilish of features!

 

HORIMER

Oh, sweet Benizalódonít you remember our earliest plight?

That constant dance with death, that most miserable fight

Our father desperately scavenging anything in sight

To feed our anguished stomachs by the morning light?

Poor Mother gone missing for many a night

And father crying away his careful might

What more could he do but risk in his fright

And bring us food Ďtil he caved to unrepressed smite

Forever estranged from his children and wife?

This is but the cockroachís life

Spent day to day in danger and strife.

 

BENIZAL

I understand, though times have changed

That your conviction stems not from a mind helplessly deranged

And there are no words I could have exchanged

To have a safer course of action arranged.

I must explain, however, that I do not condone your behavior

And dearly hope that heaven does not have to find your savior.

 

Scene 2

 

Midnight. The kitchen is left untouched, save for a few new crumbs that appeared around midday. BENIZAL and HORIMER are sitting on the kitchen table, hiding behind a lone bottle of soya sauce.

 

HORIMER (looking up)

Oh, wow! Look at the timeówe must act now!

 

BENIZAL (smiling weakly)

Alright, dear brother, let us begin.

Iíll go off left, and you look therein.

 

HORIMER (looking down)

But before we begin, Benizal, I am sorry about how stubborn Iíve been

Itís just my excitement, an unavoidable din

The inevitable urge I get to win

A hackling reminder to remember their sin.

But dear brother, please remember that no matter what happens to me

Iíll always love you and would never let you be.

Weíre inseparable, Benizal, no matter how much we seem to disagreeó

Whenever I leave, a hole forms in my heart

†That makes me wish we didnít have to depart!

But enough from me, sweet brother Benizal.

Let us act upon natureís apprisal!

 

BENIZAL (smiling)

I wouldnít let you go if I thought otherwise, dear brother.

Let us spend this next moment quickly so we can spend together another.

 

(Benizal scuttles toward the cookie jar, darting along the wallís bumpy surface. He reaches the jar and attempts to open it, unsuccessfully working the latch.)

 

††††††††††† Enter MARIE.

 

(Benizal notices her and hides behind the jar haphazardly, his legs sticking out from behind the jar.)

 

MARIE (rubbing herself against the wall)

Gosh, I love my cookies and my milk.

Ah, Iím so hungry!

 

(She opens the pantry, searching for the cookie jar. She notices Benizalís legs.)

 

MARIE (salivating profusely)

BOAAHH!!

 

(She lifts up her hand and slams it on Benizal. He dies.)

 

Scene 3

 

Dawn, the next day. HORIMER is returning from his excursion, pulling a thread attached to a piece of bread. He hides it under a cabinet and begins to search for Benizal.

 

HORIMER

Benizal! Oh, Benizal!

Where art thou Benizal?

 

(He climbs toward the shelf. A brown lump catches his eye.)

 

HORIMER

Benizal? Is that you, brother?

 

(He scurries up to the corpse.)

 

HORIMER

BENIZAL! Noómy dear brotherÖ!

I couldnít keep my promise, could I? How I have wronged your sacred soul! Benizal, Benizal! This isnít right! You didnít deserve this, poor brotherÖ

Pause.

 

HORIMER

No, no, no! I cannot accept this!

 

(Horimer rises onto his feet and begins to chant an old cockroach prayer. His body begins to oscillate and his exoskeleton begins to fall off. His vestigial wings begin to enlarge and vibrate at a speed of nineteen kilometers per second. The chanting ceases, and his body begins to change in color, turning from a bitter maroon to a ghastly lavender. Horimer rises off of his feet, his wings still beating with mauve intensity. He becomes HORIMER THE ASCENDED GHOST.)

 

HORIMER THE ASCENDED GHOST

Murahhh! The umbrellaís come round to a brolly, my friends! In chastised appraisal shall we venture on with eroded acetone, for I am now the drag queen of this palace! My Benizal, rise up! Rise up! My ring shall not secede by the evening light! The illusionary borders that rescind this imaginary pedantry have been ruptured by the volcanic dream that silences my misprision running levorotatory to this river situated right here, but the lavatory stands in the way of my unscathing, Benizalóyour soul!

 

CORPSE OF BENIZAL (spitting)

Impure! Impure! Impure!

 

HORIMER THE ASCENDED GHOST (with a nasal voice)

Come, now. Howís the brolly?

 

(Benizalís corpse pulls out an umbrella from inside its body.)

 

CORPSE OF BENIZAL (grimacing)

He whomst come here shall suffer!

 

HORIMER THE ASCENDED GHOST

Whom thought Benizalíll becometh this garbage? Iíll makest my exit now.

 

Exeunt HORIMER THE ASCENDED GHOST.

 

Long pause.

 

Enter MARIE.

 

(Marie looks around the kitchen lethargically, eyeing the various pots and pans scattered about. She spots Benizalís corpse behind the cookie jar and begins to cry.)

 

MARIE

Come, now, Iíve banished a witch

Cooking with blood and honey, thick and rich

This is my Van Houten cocoaó

Iíve hit my limit!

 

(Marie explodes.)

 

CORPSE OF BENIZAL

Horimer!

 

End.